THE HAUNTING PAST MYSTERY OF BIGFOOT

THE HAUNTING PAST: THE MYSTERY OF BIG FOOT While enroute to Canada, Tami and I would open the file, on what might be the most laugh-able case, we had, ever, reviewed. It was no wonder the Canadian government had requested the Brown Agency to investigate. While reports, of "big foot", wandering into cities, seeming to be searching, for food, were older than I was, what the Canadians were trying to "keep a lid on", were the reports, of "big foot", not just vandalizing property. Some women were suggesting that "big foot" was having sex, with the women. While five, of these "reports", were from women, who claimed that "big foot" was no worse than the womens husbands, three women, actually, claimed the creature was BETTER, in bed, than husbands were. The reason why Canadian law enforcement was concerned was because, until recently, "big foot" had been known to AVOID contact, with humans. The Canadians wanted to know the reason WHY such a creature would, suddenly, change its habits. Taami's first thought was "I would bet that "big foot" is being blamed, for the womens infidelity." After all, ever since "big foot" had been known to be hunted, un-successfully, for centuries, HOW could anyone prove the creature fathered no human children? Add to this the fact that, historically, "big foot" only roamed towns, AFTER dark, when cover was easier to find, and this would add even MORE suspicion, and reports, of the creature, being reported, leaving homes "the morning after". By the time G.S.2 passed into Canadian Air Space, and approached our destination, Tami's mind was made up, even before we landed. As for my own mind, it was, more-or-less, made up, once we landed, and a sheriff gave us the "news". "Big foot" had been arrested, inside a local diner, where the creature had written its order, for breakfast, then sat down, to eat. When the sheriff said "At present, our "big foot" is "cooling his heels", in a jail cell." When Tami asked "Have you identified him, yet?" The sheriff would say "No such luck. Between his suit, and the fact that he only responds, to questions, with growls, and grunts, we suspect that he is a paid actor." Tami and I realized what the sheriff meant, when we stepped inside the sheriff's office, and got the shock of our lives. Tami was first to ask "Thats Chewbacca?" Then Tami asked "Is this a joke?" The sheriff would say "No ma'am. While that IS a Star Wars "Chewbacca" suit, we believe there is a human inside." I would add "Obviously. If he wrote out a breakfast order." When I added "For the record, WHAT did he order?" The sheriff produced his notebook, then read "Six eggs, over easy, a pound of bacon, three cups, of coffee, four glasses of Orange Juice, and a stack, of buttered toast". When Tami would ask "Would it be safe to say that this amount of food would feed a small family?" The sheriff would say "A family, of four, maybe." I observed the "creatures" reaction, as I suggested "I think our "friend", here, was preparing for an extended hike. Maybe, across the border, into America." I was right. As I mentioned the hike, into America, "Chewbacca's" eyes moved toward me, in awareness. When the sheriff would say "Impossible. We have the finest border patrol, in North America." When I looked at the "creature", as I suggested "But, how MANY, of your guards, would report seeing "Chewbacca", crossing the brder?" I saw the intelligence, in those eyes, as the "creature" listened, as the sheriff would say "**I** would not have believed it, if I hadn't seen it, in the diner." I would say "Precisely. NO officer, in their right mind, would report seeing this alien, Wookie, Chewbacca, crossing the Canadian-American border" Tami would ask "This leaves the question of WHY this person CHOSE to "break cover", and order breakfast. It would be like he was begging to be caught." The sheriff would suggest "It MIGHT have something to do with that university team, that we invited in. You know about the women, alledging sex, with the creature?" Tami and I would agree. That is when the sheriff would suggest "We asked for a team, not just to identify "this" (the sheriff said, as he pointed at the creature), but to test the womens stories. See if any, of the women were just looking for attention." By the time the sheriff finished updating us, on the creatures latest "escapades", the researchers had arrived, and, try as they might, to avoid using the tranquillizer darts, the researchers ended up using four darts, which "hit home", and the "creature" fell asleep. The person, who designed this suit, was one, master, costumer. It would take almost an hour, to find the connection points. Once we did, however, facial recognition, and finger-prints, provided an I.D., even before the human was awake. In fact, by the time the man was awake, deputies had aided the researchers, in "testing" the women, who had alleged "encounters", for "inter-species" breeding. While the women complained up a storm, when threatened with arrest, and filing false criminal, reports, the women decided to comply with the tests. NO one was surprised when it turned out that all "residue", inside the womens bodies, was HUMAN. Inside the jail, and without his costume, when the man was questioned, he admitted "Sherlock, here (meaning me) had it figured, right. Once I knew them egg-heads were coming, I KNEW my "big foot" act was over with. I HAD hoped that, when I appearred, at the diner, cashiers, and staff, would be scarred, silent. Sherlock was right, though. My plan was to down my breakfast, then WALK across the border, and ditch the costume." When the sheriff would ask "WHY come to Canada, in the first place?" The actor would say "I was HIRED, by someone. Someone, who thought that big foot had not been seen, in too long a time. My job was to make the animal SEEM less intelligent." The sheriff would say "More sightings would mean more media coverage". ""Big foot" would be in the news, again. Thats what my employer said, anyway." When the sheriff would ask "Just WHO is this "employer"?" The actor would say "NO idea. Just sent me the costume, and a first class plane ticket, as well as $50,000, in cash. All I had to do was walk around, and let people SEE me." When Tami would ask "What about the women, who said you attacked them?" The actor looked startled as he said "Now, WAIT one minute. I was hired to dress, in a costume, and let people SEE me. I have NOTHING to do with those, wild, stories. I may have been IN town, but I was, fully, costumed! THAT, I will SWEAR to, in court. I never molested any woman." When his D.N.A. test came back "negative", "big foot" was "off the hook". After this, the women were charged with "Inciting to riot". This, for upsetting other women, with the fear that "big foot" would molest other women, as well. Yes, this is the quickest case Tami and I ever wrapped. (OR, was it?) For the mans honesty, the actor was allowed to WALK across the border, back into America. As for Tami and I, we were about to return, to G.S.2, and fly back, to America, when a hunter came into town, telling the sheriff "This time, I TRACKED it like you told me to." When Tami and I looked interested, the sheriff would say "Johnson, here, says there are REAL big foot's, out there, in the wilderness. According to Johnson, the creatures are protecting something." When Johnson would add "Sure are. I guess I got to close, this time. Instead of vanishing, like they, usually, does, THIS time, one got right in my face, did an immitation, of a grizzly bear, then turned, and vanished. I tell you, sheriff, there is something, in that area, and those creatures dont want it seen." When Tami would suggest "Maybe, it is just their lair. Maybe, they are trying to protect their members?" Johnson would produce a map, saying "Here, here, here, and here. Outposts, where they watch." "Patrols, every hour. You cant tell ME that security is for protecting family members. I tell you those things is hiding something!" When the sheriff would ask "What do you want me to do? Get a search warrant, for the entire wilderness? How many creatures are there? Even if I did get a warrant, HOW would I serve it?" When Johnson would suggest "Them army surplus vehicles Adams has. Gas one up, load them with weapons..." The sheriff would interupt, asking "Then, what? Shoot up the forrest? Kill how many animals? Animal rights are, already, crawling all over us, looking for a reason to press charges. If we pull a D-Day style invasion, on the wilderness, my badge would not be worth the metal it is made of." When Johnson would say "Dammit! Sheriff! We MUST attack them before they decide to attack us!" (Where had Tami and I heard such rhetoric, before?) When I asked Johnson "Pardon my asking, but WHY do you see these creatures as a threat? What have the creatures done, to deserve being attacked?" Johnson would say "I dont like them. Too secretive. No idea what they are doing, in them woods. Could be assembling bombs, for all we know." When the sheriff realized that Johnson was about to "go off the deep end", with another of his "attack" theories, the sheriff promised to look into the information, and sent Johnson home. After this, the sheriff would inform Tami and I "I really dont think "big foot" is planning an "invasion". After all, the creatures have been recorded, for centuries. If the creatures were going to attack, why wait until Canada is a well-established nation?" (Neither Tami, nor I, had any answers) When Tami transmitted her daily report, to Mr. Brown, however, it would seem that our boss had information, FOR us. "Yes, the military has records, showing that Johnson served, in both Afghanistan, and Iraq. Multiple tours, in each place. It seems, however, that, after awhile, Johnson began "seeing" the Taliban, everywhere. He not only began rounding up any locals "suspected" of Taliban sympathy, but he took his weapon, and held some American soldiers hostage, telling command "They are Taliban, in our uniforms." Johnson was given an honorable dis-charge, after it was realized that he could not distinguish the Taliban, from Afghani's, Iraqi's, and even Muslum-Americans. While the Pentagon vehemently denies the problem, there have been dozens, of such dis-charges, among soldiers who, once in combat, for awhile, can no-longer distinguish between friend and foe." That night, as Tami and I were relaxing, on-board G.S.2, the sheriff called, saying "I need your help, like pronto, or STAT, even." When Tami activated the receiver, asking "Whats up, sheriff?" The sheriff would say "Trouble, like in SPADES." When Tami would ask "Explain?" The sheriff would say "Remember when I told Johnson to go home, and relax. I told him that I would look into his report?" When Tami would say "Yes, a few hours ago." The sheriff would say "Well, Johnson did not "go home". Instead, he broke into the hardware store. Took enough explosives, and ammunition, to wipe this town out, ten times over." Tami would suggest "You are concerned that Johnson is about to attack the creatures?" The sheriff would say "Worse. I am afraid that, once he runs out of ammo, the creatures will not only dispose of HIM, but they WILL see the event as an attack, on THEIR lair. The creatures may attack the town, out of retaliation, for the lives Johnson takes." Tami would whisper, sadly "Just like the Middle East, after 9/11." The sheriff would say "Exactly! Unless we stop him, he could start a war, which neither Canada, nor the British Empire, wants." When Tami would ask "How much, of a head start does Johson have?" The sheriff would say "Too much. Remember that this is a small town. No need for electronic security. The hardware store owner only reported the break in, while doing his evening rounds." When the sheriff would add "We must HURRY". This is when Tami would suggest an alternative to the sheriff's Jeep. "Why dont you come on-board our plane. We can be almost anywhere, inside fifteen minutes." When the sheriff would ask "Even when we find him, WHERE will you land?" Tami would say "Trust me, our pilots can land, on a dime, if need be. All we need is something, which belongs to Johnson." After the sheriff grabbed an object, which was "covered" in Johnson's D.N.A., it took maybe ten minutes, for the computer to find a "match". Another five minutes, and we were "hot", on Johnsons trail. By the way the man was driving, it was a wonder that he did not blow himself up, by accident. When a blast, of 30-calibur gun-fire, from our port turret, did not dissuade Johnson, and the sheriff would say "He did his tours, bullets wont scare him." Still, our pilots tried the starboard side turret, and its 50-calibur rounds. We can only assume that Johnson must have thought he was back, in the Middle East, and fighting the Taliban, since the former soldier drove right through the barrage, and our pilot would be left to confer with our co-pilot, asking "Plan Z?" When the co-pilot agreed, our pilot brought G.S.2 around, for another pass. This while our co-pilot, looking grim, at his assigned duty, grabbed some C-4, from our supplies, affixed detonators, then, with G.S.2 "hovering" just over the moving truck, the co-pilot would toss the bricks, of C-4 onto the hood of Johnsons truck. By the time Johnson realized what the lumps were, Johnson looked up, saw the air force man cross himself, give a massive salute, then flipped the switch, on the hand-held detonator. Now, ofcourse, with the placement, of the charges, a normal, motor vehicle would have broken in half, with the engine compartment rushing away from the passenger compartment. In Johnson's case, however, with his truck practically over-flowing, with explosives, from the cab, to the rear deck, there was no way to prevent the truck from exploding. Johnson went up, in a fire-ball, so powerful, that, even at 250 feet, overhead, G.S.2 was "rocked", as alarms shrieked, and the computers fought the concussion, of the blast, while trying to level our plane. After what seemed like an "eternity", but was, actually, only a couple of moments, G.S.2 found clean, solid, air, and the co-pilot had "fought" his way back to the cockpit, and aided his partner, in bringing the plane back into balance. Minutes later, when G.S.2 went vertical, and landed, near the truck, the flames were so hot that we could not get close enough to use our fire extinguishers. The "war on terror" had claimed ANOTHER, innocent, victim. The sheriff would suggest "He must not only have filled his gas tank, prior to this, but, I would assume we will find the remains, of gas cans, once the fire burns itself out." When Tami, catiously, asked "Gasoline?" our co-pilot would say "Yes, ma'am. It is a tactic, employed, by the military, for many years. Locate a target, then combine munitions with cans of gasoline Even if the transport blows up, short of destination, sheer velocity will carry the gasoline to the final destination." When I would suggest "A suicide run?" Our pilot would say "Hard to say. In World War Two, may drivers dove out, of trucks, just before impact. Some, of the drivers, actually survived." By the time the nearest fire department reached our location, the truck had all-but burned itself out. When the remains, of the gas cans, were collected, the fire department would ask "What was he planning to do? Blow up a mountain?" Later, the sheriff, and towns-people, would make CERTAIN that Johnson, a military veteran, with a sterling service record, would receive a proper burial. (The "war on terror" had created far too many "Johnsons". People, who, otherwise stable, had been turned into "animals", who could not tell friend from foe). While th fire department had been collecting evidence, from the explosion, Tami had been on the internet, with searches, cross-referencing "big foot", with "foot patrols", "guard posts", and "lairs/camps". What amazed neither of us was just how much "big foot" lore there was. While the most hilarious of this was that "big foot" was an alien, and Earth was a research outpost... The goofiest was the idea that "big foot" was not an animal, at all. Some, of these stories, suggsted that the military was dressing soldiers, as "big foot", in order to guard military bases. OUR favorite version, however, was that "big foot" was the descendant, of a prior race. One which left behind weapons, or even knowedge, which the creatures were sworn to protect. Thankfully, to most humans, "big foot" was nothing more than folk lore, and bed time stories. While a military attache had been dispatched, to bring the remains, of the "mobile bomb" to a military base, when Tami asked the soldier "HAS the military ever considered an all-out search?" The attache would say "Ma'am, you understand that the wilderness covers so much land. The only way to search, thoroughly, would be to "flatten the place", then search the wreckage. Can you imagine what the "tree-huggers", and environmentalists, would say? No, Ma'am. I am not about to risk my career, and my pension, chasing some wild animal." When Tami would suggest "Then, you DONT think its human?" The attached would say "Ma'am, I believe we, both, have better things to do then chase legends. Now, if you will excuse me." Once the "mobile bomb" (Johnsons truck), had been loaded onto a trailer, the attache joined his unit, and departed. When I would ask Tami "I wonder WHO is right, as in correct? The military, or the camp-fire stories?" When Tami would, in turn, ask the sheriff "What is down this path, anyway?" The sheriff would say "As far as I know, this trail ends, just past some camp sites. It just dissolves into the forrest." When Tami would ask our pilots "Do we have enough fuel, for a leisurely fly-by?" Our co-pilot would say "Our tanks are only 90% full. We can, only, cruise, until the food runs out." When Tami would suggest just a "quick pass", at the end of the path. Just enough to verify what lay at the end of the path. Everyone, including the sheriff, would agree. While the sheriff had, initially, seemed so certain, of where the path ended, even the sheriff was surprised that, as we hovered, over the end of the path, it appearred as though someone had EXTENDED the path. Where to, even the sheriff did not know. While our thermal sensors did, occassionally, produce some "human-sized" images, which were about as tall as a professional football player, the problem was the D.N.A. analysis. While G.S.2 got close enough, to five, of the creatures, to make the creatures howl, and make "gestures" at the plane, when we "shot" the creatures, with D.N.A. analyzers, the results were neither human, ape, or anything similar. In fact, our on-board computers registered the creatures as "Version: X. Species: Unknown. D.N.A. matches: Negative." By the time the analyzers batteries gave out, we were left with more questions than ever. When we returned the sheriff to his office, he would return to his "normal" life. Fences being crushed. Animal traps being poached. The usual assortment, of women, all complaining of being "watched". It was not until the evening, of our farewell celebration, that things got "weird". Our pilots were off, with the older men, sharing war stories, while Tami and I were enjoying good food, and drink, when we, all, heard familiar, and un-familiar, sounds. The sounds, which we recognized, were the sounds, of G.S.2's 30, and 50-calibur gun turrets firing. Since the guns were firing, that meant someone had violated the planes security perimeter. What spooked locals, and caught the sheriff's attention, were the "wookie-like" howls, which accompanied the gun-fire. When the sheriff, Tami, myself, and our pilots, rushed for our plane, we may have found no bodies, but we found plenty of heavy foot prints, and pools of blood. When we listened, and heard more howls, then there was the question of "Are they planning another attack?" followed by "That does not SOUND like an attack call. Sounds more like a "help with the wounded" call." When our pilots would ask "Why attack our plane, anyway? Only our codes can operate the systems." The sheriff would suggest "Maybe when your ship got close enough, to "tag" them, the creatures interpreted this as an "invasion of privacy", or "intent to attack". While we rested, in town, for another night, sometime, between 3, and 4, A.M., someone tossed a whole tree through a store window. By the time Tami and I arrived, on scene, the sheriff would be telling locals "It wasn't the excavators, or bulldozers" When Tami would ask "How do you know?" The sheriff would say "Look at the bark. No evidence of chains, or spikes. I, also, dont think those claw marks are real." When Tami would ask "WHY is that?" The sheriff would say "Its just a guess, but a person, tall enough to move that tree? Maybe fifteen, to twenty, feet tall? Muscular, to the max." When I would ask "Other options?" The sheriff would suggest "Maybe ropes. The question is: HOW to dispose of the ropes, before we arrived?" When at breakfast, there was more gun-fire, and more howls, from the area, of G.S.2, Tami and I agreed with our pilots. Someone did not WANT us here. While our automatic defense turrets protected the plane from attack, when Tami and I reviewed the video footage, even our trained eyes could not accept what we saw. While our trained pilots could not believe the images, either, when another round, of howls, came from close by, our pilots would say "Time to lift off. Take your seats, please." Thank Heaven for that unusuall alloy, which our hull was made of. When "un-specified targets" began hurtling BOULDERS, at G.S.2, our composite hull took the barrage, in stride. As for the REASON, for the attacks, the best that the Brown Agency could offer was a combination of "We invaded their territory", as well as the insertion of the D.N.A. devices. Still, our pilots remained on "full aleart" until we passed over the Canada/U.S. border. On the way back, to our home state, Tami received a message, from the Brown Agency biology department. "Results of testing remain in-conclusive. D.N.A. seems to be a mix, of up to seventeen species. Some extinct. NO definitive analysis available. Species remains unknown. Sorry, but this is ALL we have." At G.S.2's home hangar, the maintenance crews seemed amazed at the lack of damage, caused by the boulders. As for our "report", to Mr. Brown, this was full of more "holes", than Swiss Cheese. As for "Chewbacca", the actor was off, on another acting gig. This time, as a different creature. As for the women, who had claimed "molestation", by "big foot", these women were left in disgrace. The Canadian government remained un-certain, of how to prosecute such a case. As for the creatures, the government was of the feeling that "If there was something, out in that wilderness, the military sure wasn't interested. Nor was the government". The sheriff would report that, after what happened, with Johnson, the number, of trackers, trying to locate "big foot" had dropped, from dozens, to only three of the most "hard core". These people had been retained, since they promised a LIVE "big foot", to various carnivals. Tami and I were just about to take a well-deserved rest, when Mr. Brown would suggest "If you have a minute, I would appreciate your thoughts, on this file. It doesn't seem like much, bu the client seems sincere. I dont know why, but I have an "odd feeling" about this one." Yep! So much for rest, and relaxation. POST SCRIPT: Sometimes, I wonder if we should have taken the "Mystery of the Gaming House", after all. WHAT would our lives be like, if I had, never, talked Tami into attending the original event? Would our lives be quieter, if Tami had followed her instincts, and thrown away that post card? Then, again. It was Tami whose treaties, between the living, and the dead, which were allowing dozens of cities to "Rest in Peace", at night. Besides, as Tami would point out "IF we were not doing this, WHAT would we be doing, with our time?"